Monday, December 25, 2006
MAKE MY WISH COME TRUE..ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS..IS WHO?
finally..i've got a christmas entry. the smell of sweet breeze across my face as i sip the last of the red wine our family shared last noche buena, made me realize i never wanted anything this christmas. although i completed the simbang gabi, i never wished for anything. year after year,i never had the courage to wish for stuff i think i need or i want and just die expecting for things i'll never ever have. not necessarily die, i'm exaggerating a little bit, but that's just how christmas goes right? you wish for an ipod, ps3, and other else down to its last detail and expect you'll have it on one of the very special, if not the only special, occasion of the year..
so, just for the sake of saying "may christmas spirit din naman ako" this year, i'd list what i'm wishing for at this very moment. i'm actually enumerating a few human beings who may or may not be able to make my christmas complete..
--my sister
the scenario:
she's becoming more and more of an invisible individual in our home. on school days she'll go home late, and we all go to school early while she leave the house after noon. on weekends, she's with her friends. my mom's even thankful she still goes home. as a result, she's always misunderstood and often, ended with a quarrel or two with my parents.
the wish:
that she'll share not just a bit of time for her family even on non-christmas days. i miss you xandra. we all miss you.
--my two grandfathers
the scenario:
they had gone before us more than two years na. somehow, i long for that grandfather image everytime christmas draws near. and now that it's christmas, i miss having lolos who'll sit with us during noche buena and kris kringle. i don't think i had the chance to even hug them with sincerity and not just the kid i was, before they passed away, expecting for presents in return.
the wish:
that we could spend time with them again.*sigh* i believe they're watching me from heaven right now and they know what i'm trying to convey here anyway..
--my best friend
the scenario:
we never talked on the phone anymore and everytime we do, we always run out of stories unlike before. i never get to tell her everything because she's busy with schoolwork. i tried to still be open to her and find time to talk and share stuff but i think she never listen wholeheartedly. we laugh but we never share our hurts anymore. she never called me when she's in pain. i wonder if she had already replaced me..
the wish:
of course, i do wish our barkada reunion on the 29th would push thru. i miss her and my anonymous soo much.
--hershey
the scenario:
another disappearing act. sadly, people come and go out of everyone's life. i know it's hard if the two of you shared a lot of things even for a short period of time. especially if the experience left a lot of questions unanswered. i never even got the chance to know if all the things we shared were true..
the wish:
well i have two wishes on this..
one: that he'll come back and maybe, just maybe, we'll figure out together why i'm having trouble getting him off my mind..
two: that if he doesn't, i'll learn to forget this bittersweet feeling..
i'm not telling these in order to ask for things in return. getting these all unloaded from my chest is truly relieving.
and as christmas being perceived by many through children's laughter, christmas songs, lots of food and presents, this year is different. i learned one very important thing - finding peace and serenity even for just a single day with yourself.
ge. FLEW on
12/25/2006 09:49:00 PM